Hibernation

The knock came just as Harry was putting in the last screw for the plastic housing for his latest device he called the Whiner. The particular audio frequency it emitted had the same signature as a baby screaming, yet was inaudible. As it result, when switched on, all adult males in the immediate vicinity became intensely uncomfortable and overcome with a powerful need to get away.

Harry opened the front door to find a police officer and two men with Health Services insignias on their uniforms. “Good evening gentlemen, how may I help you?” Harry asked in a friendly tone.

“Harry Koesler, you missed your court appointment this morning. In accordance with the terms of your bail, you are under arrest,” announced the police officer.

“That is excellent news, Officer. Please come in while I collect my things and arrange for my departure,” Harry replied pleasantly.  He opened the door wide and repeated, “Please come inside.”

“Harry Koelser, I am Brian Watson from Health Services. I assume you understand the reason for your arrest and the conditions of your punishment.”

“Yes I do Mr. Watson. I am to be subjected to hibernation therapy for the crime of not voluntarily submitting myself to hibernation therapy.”

“Actually, to be more precise, your crime is not having health insurance. You have willfully violated the terms of your insurance policy, forcing the agency to deny your coverage. It is illegal to not have coverage when it is within your financial means,” Brian retorted.

“Yes, you are precisely correct, Mr. Watson. However, despite my advanced age, it is a violation of my human rights to be forced to submit to this hibernation procedure. I have demonstrated my cognitive clarity through a barrage of tests by meeting or exceeding the standards for people half my age.”

“There is no reasonable doubt,” argued Brian, “that a person over 100 years of age does not have extensive cognitive impairment. Hibernation is a safe and effective treatment for restructuring synaptic connections in the brain as well as a long list of other beneficial effects on the heart, liver, and kidney function. Despite your test results, the fact that you refuse to undergo the procedure is the most convincing evidence that you have suffered cognitive decline.”

“Nonetheless,” replied Harry calmly, “that would be six weeks of my life that I will never get back.” He flipped the switch on the Whiner device. “I will admit, that hearing loss has become a bit of a problem lately.”

“Harry,” Brian said with a slight tone of desperation in his voice. “This is not the time or the place to discuss this. You missed your court hearing where you could have tried to convince the judge. You need to come with us. As already stated, you are under arrest. Please collect your things and prepare to leave immediately.”

The police officer and the other Health Services agents were noticeably distressed and anxious to get moving. They began shifting around on their feet and the officer stated abruptly, “Yes, it is time to go.”

“Not a problem gentlemen. My bag is packed and I am ready to go.” Larry smiled good-naturedly, deftly slipped the device into his pocket and walked to the front door.  As the others followed, he switched the device off. Their relief was immediately apparent.

The three men almost smiled at this sudden change in atmosphere.  It was evident that they felt relieved and happy to be leaving. But as they approached the vehicle, their anxiety suddenly returned. Everyone except Harry was quiet and tense for several minutes.

Harry cleared his throat, switched off the device, and broke the silence with, “Gentlemen, I appreciate that you have a job to do and would like to get this over with as soon as possible, but if you don’t mind, I would like to drop something off at the airport.”

The sudden relief at the same time as the sound of Harry’s voice had a Pavlovian effect on the three men. Their brains immediately ascribed the sudden break in tension to the sound of Harry’s voice. Despite themselves, they looked up to him with warm affection. “Yes, of course, it is just right here – five minutes wouldn't be a bother to anyone, will it?” the police officer asked the other men.

“No, no – of course not!” they replied in unison.

“I just need to drop off a small package for my granddaughter – she will be flying in to visit me in a few days, but, of course, I won’t be there. She will need a few things – papers, identification and such – to take care of business while I’m gone.”

“Not a problem Mr. Koestler,” replied the officer. “We are here.”

“You will wait in the car while I run in,” Harry said while switching on the Whiner. “I won’t be but a minute.”  The sudden anxiety the men felt when he said this was translated into fear. They did not respond or look at Harry as he stepped out of the car, leaving the device seat. “Stay here. I’ll be right back.”

As he entered the airport lobby, a young woman quickly came up to him, “Grandpa! You’re late – the flight is about to leave! Let’s go!”

“Good to see you, Katie. Yes, we should probably hurry.”