Amadori Maillard

http://www.sri.com/newsroom/in-the-news/swarm-ant-sized-robots-your-service

Amadori: Your house is very clean. It even has a new-house smell. Where do you find the time to clean it?
Maillard: Oh, I have help. It's nothing really.
Amadori: Do you mind if I get a glass of water?
Maillard: No, please help yourself, I'm just going to put these bags away.
Amadori: Oh, wow! What are those?!!
Maillard: What?! Oh, those! Those are my little helpers!
Amadori: They're bugs! Ants, or something! They're disgusting!
Maillard: No! No! They're little robots. They go around chewing up dirt and dust.
Amadori: Really? Where do they put all the dirt? They're so small...
Maillard: They burn them or turn them into gases.
Amadori: Like volatile organic compounds - VOCs? Aren't those bad for you?
Maillard: No, I don't think so - they smell like pine or toasted bread. I guess it depends on where they are cleaning.
Amadori: Well, I think those are VOCs - all that smells is a VOC.
Maillard: Well, whatever. They do a fantastic job of cleaning the windows, the floors, the bathroom - everything. They work mostly at night, so I usually don't see them.
Amadori: Well, they're here now. It looks like they're going back into their holes. Does this glass smell like turpentine to you, or is it my imagination?
Maillard: It might have a faint smell. They clean the dishes too. I find that giving them a quick rinse with water gets rid of most of the smell. But I don't mind - I never have to do any dishes!
Amadori: That is unbelievably convenient, I admit. But you know it's not good for you? All these gases cause cancer and other health problems.
Maillard: Well, I haven't heard anything about that... Did you say they were going back into their holes?
Amadori: Yes, they're crawling into a couple of holes in the back of your cabinet.
Maillard: There shouldn't be any holes.
Amadori: Well, there are...
Maillard: Shoot! That means I need to call a technician. I wonder if this is under warrantee.
Amadori: What's the problem?
Maillard: They are eating the house - like termites.
Amadori: Is your wood rotting? Don't termites only like rotten wood?
Maillard: No - my wood's not rotting. These guys are malfunctioning. They're supposed to eat dirt and dust, not the house.
Amadori: Maybe it's too clean in here and they are having an autoimmune reaction!
Maillard: What do you mean?
Amadori: Without worms and bacteria, our immune system will sometimes attack itself - eczema, Chron's, Multiple Sclerosis... These guys are programmed to look for dirt, but without any dirt, they eat the house.
Maillard: I don't know anything about that. I'm calling technical support now.
Amadori: Maybe you should get a dog or a cat or something.